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friends, Life, Motherhood, Parenting, women

Teaching Children Compassion

If my children grow up to be compassionate, my job as a mother will have been a success.

Confidence is important too, but without compassion, it might not have the catalyst to be channeled in the best way.  Yes, if I had to choose one trait I’d wish to instill in my children, it would be compassion.

Sadly, it’s easy to normalize the violence and craziness that has become our new normal.  It’s scarily easy to be desensitized to the tragedy-filled headlines we’ve become accustomed to reading.  In our hyper-connectivity, we can’t shut out the bad.

Sometimes leading by example doesn’t cut the mustard and we can use the help of visual aids.  To that end, I did some research on children’s books that help drive home the message of compassion.  We all want a safe and beautiful world in which to raise our children but we only have the power to control our own environment, and that starts at home.

Enemy Pie (Inclusion)

First impressions may not be what they seem.  When a new boy moves into the neighborhood, a father devises a plan to facilitate an unlikely friendship by using a recipe called “Enemy Pie”.  As he instructs his son, one of the steps is to spend a whole day playing with the enemy.   The book endearingly examples the struggles and benefits of making new friends, and the surprise outcomes that arise from preconceived notions.

 

 

Pete the Cat: Rock on Mom and Dad (Gratitude)

I love love love the message of this book!  How many times do moms and dads go un-thanked and seemingly unappreciated?  Pete is determined to show his gratitude to his parents, whom he recognizes do so much for him, and ultimately learns it’s not the size or type of gift, but the gratitude that comes from deep within that matters.

 

 

Maddi’s Fridge (Poverty/Hunger)

Two friends enjoy each other’s company.  They go to school together and play together, yet one has a very different home life.  She doesn’t always have the energy to keep up with her friend because she doesn’t have enough food to eat.  This book so artfully and beautifully raises awareness about poverty and child hunger.  Maddi’s friend is thoughtful enough to pack extra food in her lunch to feed her friend but they sometimes spoil before lunchtime.  So she and her mother brainstorm ways in which to help Maddi and her family.  This is a thought-provoking book to help you and your child form a discussion on possible ways to help curb hunger in your community.

The Earth Book (Environment)

What better way to teach compassion than by empowering your little one with the tools they need to keep the planet green and clean? This book cleverly showcases different ways and tips with which even the youngest member in your family can help.  Caring for the planet teaches compassion that can be transferred to other aspects of life

 

 

It’s Okay to Be Different (Diversity)

Geared towards the younger child, this book creatively    showcases a myriad of differences, from missing teeth, to facial features, to skin color, that make us uniquely us.  More importantly, the book emphasizes that those differences are okay!  We’re not all made to look alike or like the same things.  Part of the learning process is in accepting those differences in us and in other.

 

 

The Name Jar (Acceptance, Inclusion)

When Unhei moves to the States from Korea, she understandably has some anxiety.  Will the other kids like her? Will she fit in?  Rather than introduce herself by her Korean name, she tells the students that she’ll have a western name picked out by the following week.  So, her classmates help by contributing their suggested names into a name jar for Unhei to pick from.  In a turn of events, one classmate comes to visit her neighborhood and overhears Unhei using her real name.  He then hides the name jar to encourage Unhei to use her Korean name and share it’s special meaning with the class, which she ultimately does.  This book celebrates diversity, multiculturalism,  and accepting our own uniqueness.

Spaghetti in a Hot Dog Bun (Bullying)

Kids can say mean things and it’s hard to be the object of teasing.  Lucy is confident and proud of her differences (she likes spaghetti and ketchup in a hot dog bun!), despite Ralph’s comments.  The tables are turned when one day, Ralph needs help and Lucy is there to the rescue.  It’s a wonderful book to launch pad discussions about modeling kind behavior and staying true to ones values even in the face of opposition.

 

 

I hope you love this list as much as my family did!

Your Brainy Chick,

Serene

 

Lifestyle

An Ode to My Dog: CoCo

I didn’t grow up with a dog, in fact, the only pets I had were parakeets and rabbits.  Both of which I knew I would never have as an adult.

Just after I got married, 11 years ago, my husband surprised me with a maltipoo for my birthday. I was speechless and a little upset mostly because I had no idea what it meant to be a dog owner! Little did I know I was about to embark on a journey that would reshape the person I am today.

We named our first furry baby, Peanut. To be honest, before he arrived I had put him on a one week trial….if it didn’t work out, we were going to send him back.  Peanut was born in Texas and arrived via American Airlines where we met for the first time. He was 8 weeks old. Tiny, like a Peanut, with white curly hair. He was terrified. When I reached for him I immediately panicked because I didn’t know what to do next. Once I got hold of him from the back of his crate, he curled into the palm of my hand and calmed the nerves we both had and we both immediately felt a sense of relief. It was clear, I was consumed with so much love for this little animal.  It hit me in that moment that we had just become family. It didn’t take more than 5 minutes for me to make my decision that he was staying with us forever!

Most valuable lesson as a dog owner:

Unconditional love. Peanut gave me the gift of friendship with no strings attached.  He grew to love me and my husband as his furry parents and we loved him as our furry baby. He journeyed with us through two pregnancies and babies and accepted and protected our kids with every bone in his body.  We tragically lost Peanut to a coyote attack shortly after his 7th birthday and it felt just as tragic as the loss of any family member. There were days Peanut and I were besties and days we were frenemies, but we were family. In his absence I learned that he taught me to be more kind, more compassionate and more forgiving.

Today we have Coco another adorable maltipoo.  He is everything Peanut was and continues to be for us.  While having a dog can sometimes feel like work, there isn’t a moment that goes by that I’m not reminded of Peanut and how his legacy serves as a reminder to not take the human and dog relationship for granted.  I can definitely say I am a better person because of my furry babies and will be forever indebted to my dogs for the lessons they teach me everyday!

Your chick,
Sonia

Chick Picks:

There are so many versions of this sweatshirt! The one I am wearing is linked here |  A slightly higher end version of it is linked here | Revolve has a distressed version here | Jeans are linked here | Booties are sold out, but I have linked something similar here |Check out the necklace that we all have here  see it on me here

Fashion, Lifestyle

You Can Always Be Better – Summer Reads and Needs

How is it even possible that summer just started and now my trip to Chicago is already almost over!  Time really does fly when you are having fun!  As some of you may know, I am part of a fabulous book club (shout out to the Guilty Wives Club) and as I do every summer I take on a summer reading list with a combination of best sellers, recommendations and this year I have included some self exploration too!  As a woman I constantly second guess myself as an individual, as a wife, and of course as a mother.  I am always wondering if there is a better way to do what I am doing or how I can make sure that I am giving my kids the tools to be amazing individuals and citizens.


This year’s list had a little bit of everything but I wanted to share the life books that I really enjoyed that gave me just enough pep in my step each day to see things differently and offered some new ideas and perspective into my day to day life.

The List

You Are a Badass

Don’t feel bad about pepping yourself up sometimes- isn’t that what power posing is all about?? This book offers hilariously inspiring stories, sage advice, easy exercises, and the occasional swear word to help you stop being self deprecating and change the way you see yourself and your future.

 

 

 

You Do You

With social media shifting our focus to other people all the time, You Do You reminds you to spend just as time and energy on yourself as you do on other people.  If everyone is busy doing ‘their’ thing, shouldn’t you be busy doing yours?? This easy read may be the reminder by your bedside that you need to just do you!

 

 

 

It’s Not About How Good You Are, It’s About How Good You Want To Be

If you are like me and asked yourself if there is more out there for you in this world or this life then author Paul Arden has some words of wisdom for you! He takes on issues as diverse as problem solving, communicating, playing your cards right, making mistakes and creativity- all things I try to tackle each and every day!

 

 

 

The Little Book Of Life Hacks

Yumi Sakugawa shares a wide range of useful and unexpected tips for looking and feeling better, streamlining and improving your home life.  Everything from creating fun and artsy DIY projects that can brighten your living space. Everything from removing  dark circles from under your eyes, making cold brew iced coffee at home, throwing the perfect party on a budget, working out at home without a gym membership and (my favorite!) taking the perfect afternoon power nap…and more!  You can peek in and out of this book at will and get a whole lot out of it!

 

 

Parenting Recommendations

My next two recommendations are heavy on the parenting side of things.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have two daughters, both are amazing yet incredibly different, one is self motivated, one is not, one is independent, the other is not.  I have read both GRIT and The Power of Habit and these books have taught me so much about behaviors that successful people have and where and how they were taught them.  It allows parents the freedom to exercise a little tough love to teach your child a lesson – I find tough love to be so hard sometimes.  I always make excuses for my kids for example, I think that they don’t understand, or that they are too young, but these books have given me the gumption to challenge them.  To my surprise, I have watched the kids step it up.  If you need a scientific perspective with a track record on parenting then check these books out, you won’t regret it!

Well I hoped you enjoyed my book recommendations, what did you read this summer?

Your Chick,

Rina

Philanthropy

#ChooseKind : Making The Case Against Bullying

We feel so grateful to have created a platform that allows us to write on topics that hit close to home.  In recent times, “bullying” has become a buzz word and hot topic.  Movies like “Wonder” bring to the forefront that bullying can start as young as elementary school.  With children of
our own, tolerance and inclusion is critical now more than ever, especially with the introduction of cyber bullying.  The word “bully” generally insinuates a situation in which one uses intimidation to make another feel excluded or oppressed.  We feel a responsibility to take control of bullying in our own hands by starting with our own home and through our blog as a platform.

The Campaign

We recently heard about the PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center and wanted to attach ourselves to their mission of anti-bullying.  The term “bully” is sensitive, but we’ve come to realize it sees no age limit or boundaries.   “Choose Kind” takes a stand against bullying and promotes rolling up your sleeves against it.

As bloggers, we have decided to “choose kind” over words of hurt.  As women in our late 30s deciding to put ourselves out there has come with a lot of insecurity and fear of judgement.  Not only is it important for us to always to choose to be kind, but it is also important for us to tell our children to make that same choice.

Our children hear and see everything we do, so leading by example is the best we can do for the next generation.  As parents we are influencers on our children.  We’ve all heard the expression “the apple does not fall far from the tree,” therefore if you are critical and judgmental  in your home it will likely reflect through your children.

Fortunately for adults, given our experiences, we are equipped with the tools to handle situations that make us uncomfortable.  Teaching those same tools to our children is so incredibly important and is our responsibility in reshaping future generations.  Growing up it was not uncommon to hear our parents tell us, “if you have nothing nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.”  That standard still holds true today.

Take Action

We as parents need to be aware and vigilant and the Chicks of ChicksAndSalsa have decided to roll up our sleeves against bullying and hope you will join us on this mission!  Take the pledge to speak up, reach out and be a friend and consider purchasing a shirt to show your support!

With Love,

Rina and Sonia