As women, especially those of ethnic descent, we have a tendency to place ourselves last — behind spouses, kids, career. If there is anything I have learned in these past few years, it is that putting yourself first can feel good sometimes, too. It is also important to realize that ‘mom guilt’ never goes away: we will always wish that when we try a new restaurant with friends, that our husbands were there or when we discover a new park to run at, that we could exercise and watch the kids at the same time.

Moms Off Duty—that is how we feel when we squeeze in a coffee with friends during the day or get a babysitter and vent to a friend over cocktails after school. It is all-encompassing. It is the food that we eat, the activities that we participate in, the civic work that we do, the obligations we have at work, and our responsibilities at home. It is about taking a moment to build yourself as a woman, no matter what corners that life brings your way. Stringing together the moments outside of our routines are often the ones that we remember and cherish.

We challenge you to be ‘off duty’ once in a while and do something for yourself with or without someone else. Push yourself to a new limit and rediscover an old hobby. Or listen to some old tunes and dance like no one is watching. It is possible to be a great mother, an influencer, a career-builder, and an independent woman — find your way to putting yourself first and in doing that, find yourself.