I Dare You: Empowering Women (Especially Moms) to Be More Than a Housewife

A good friend called one morning and expressed her desire to produce a play, mind you she has been a part of a theater playgroup for a few years and wanted to bring light to her community theater.

I encouraged her to do so, yet she was still uncertain. As fellow mom, where would she find the time and was it even worth it? She expressed interest in wanting to do something outside of her comfort zone. I continued to encourage her and say, “do it, you have a passion, pursue it.” Little did I know she would soon take me out of my own comfort zone.

Josie, my friend, asked if I would be in her play if she produced it. My response… No, No & NO!

Okay, let’s back up for a minute, first off I have zero acting experience, second I have stage fright and third, I have the worst memory! Even if I agreed, my kids and husband dominated my life, where would I find the time to rehearse?

Another friend, Serene, was also asked to be in this play and promised that this experience would not only empower me, but also be something that I would be glad to cross off my bucket list. True, the thought of being on stage once crossed my mind growing up, but the fear of stage fright made me think twice. Despite my anxiety, I decided to go for it, for myself and also to show my children that I had other interests and roles outside of Mom and wife.

Two weeks and a million rehearsals later, I finally learned my lines and understood my character. I realized that I experienced more than just memorizing lines and relating to my character; I experienced the bond with other characters that I would be sharing a stage with. I discovered that I had found a new and different type of confidence after a long time. To act like someone else was a release that I needed from my day-to-day life. I felt alive and felt lighter like I hadn’t before.

Showtime

Three months later it was show time! For the first time I felt a rush and adrenaline that was like no other. The connection I felt with both the cast and audience was priceless! The show was called Smalls Talk and we performed it at the Parker Playhouse.

The truth is we are all scared to try something outside of our comfort zone. Had I not been pushed I wouldn’t have experienced something so fun and break that stage fright out of me.

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Its not too late to take on a challenge and make it a goal, do something different and encourage your friends to do the same. Experience something outside of your daily routine. Go ahead I DARE YOU!

Read more about what is means to be a #MomOffDuty here!

Your Chick,

Avani

Botox and the Indian Community

October 18, 2017

Botox, everyone has thought about it, many of us are doing it, so why aren’t we talking about it?

Growing up as first generation Indian Americans, my sister and I had the impossible task of representing our Indian side, our American side, and our hybrid side with grace and full understanding. This meant being respectful yet assertive and exploring our interests while not wandering too far outside of our parents understanding. It also meant looking and acting within certain cultural norms without compromising our opportunities here as Americans.

Aging is one of those unusual paradoxes where being Indian and American does not agree. It appears that Americans embrace doing things make you feel good — from facials to chemical peels to plastic surgery to Botox. There is discussion and a sharing of experiences that is a part of the American culture. I can’t speak to other communities and cultures but the Indian community from both the immigrant and first generation perspectives does not embrace artificial enhancement. Indo-American women will undergo a variety of procedures and services behind closed doors and lie about their genetics and diets to no end. An acceptance of anti-aging tools that we have available to us as Indians in America has been a difficult pill to swallow for many.

I am 36 years old, I have been getting Botox for 3 years. When I looked in the mirror after having two kids and moving homes twice, my body directly experienced the stress. My body had undergone both of those life-changing events and left me with deep wrinkles which made me feel older than I was. My friends, co-workers, and sisters were supportive when I first considered Botox (see our article here about facing judgement). We talked about it, read about it, researched it until I eventually went for it. Some family members, on the other hand, discouraged me from doing it and hesitantly added that if I did get it, I should keep it to myself. After seeing my results and my satisfaction, two short years later, they too went ahead and tried it out. But they have since kept their “genetic” advantages to themselves.

Without getting too carried away, I am grateful that I can take little steps to look the way I feel. I am not in denial of aging or of my life circumstances; this is a personal choice and one that has left me satisfied. By not sharing ideas and privatizing our desires, we cannot lift each other up in a way that can be positive in the right context.

I hope to get the discussion started. We are fortunate that one of our Savvy Chicks’, Avani, has a husband who is a plastic surgeon — if you have any questions please leave them in comments below and we will be happy to get you an expert’s perspective.

Cheers,

Rina

If Botox is not your thing yet, here are a few Chicks Picks from Beauty Chick, Neema (check out her take on sunscreen).