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Lifestyle

Dating Your Spouse

It is said that time flies, and boy do I believe it more than ever now!  I’ve been married for 11 years and, truth be told, it feels like it’s only been 2!  Granted 11 years may seem like honeymooners to some, if feels like an eternity to me!

In the early stages of our marriage, impressing each other was still very much a part of our daily routine. As time has gone on and children have entered the picture, we have learned to grow our friendship stronger than ever before. Aligning our values through parenting has created a bond stronger than I ever knew I would have with my spouse. I’ve always been in search of the perfect friendship, and what I’ve realized over time is they are hard to come by. Similarly, it would be unrealistic to find the perfect marriage. What I have found in my marriage is the perfect friendship. My husband and I have had our fair share of ups and downs, but honestly I feel like we are #FriendshipGoals. 

I feel very fortunate to have known my husband since I was 8 years old. We were next-door neighbors growing up, and even went to elementary school, middle school, and high school together.  Having gone through all those stages, I feel like we know a lot about the ins and outs of how each other work. Despite that, it wasn’t until after we got married that I really saw who my husband was as a person and as a partner in life. 

The Takeaway

Marriage is no easy feat. It takes effort, energy and understanding. Making time for the other person, especially with little humans, takes skill and willpower. The only thing that has kept us going over the years is our strong bond over communication. Trying to talk things out and make space for each other has encouraged us to continue finding the silver lining in this crazy journey we call life. I couldn’t think of a better person than my best friend to do it with.  It’s not the materialistic things, but the small things that matter.  If I could do  it all over again in the next life I would do it all over again with him. #FriendshipGoals #DateYourSpouse

Your Chick,
Sonia

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Parallel Lives : A Story of Two Moms

Sonia and I, not surprisingly, talk every day.  That is EVERY SINGLE DAY for the last 36 years — minus those few times in college where all sisters fight, of course.

She is my lifeline and through her, I have learned so much about life.  When you have someone to bounce ideas, feelings, and circumstances off of, it can be a humbling experience.  Exchanging notes with my sister and all of our Chicks over the years has taught us one thing:

“We may have all come on different ships, but we’re in the same boat now. “

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

We Dress Up For Date Nights
We Practice Self Care

Realizing that we all have common human experiences like relationships, work, family, and responsibilities, is the secret to happiness. Sonia lives in downtown Chicago and I live in a small town in middle Georgia. It is easy for me to sometimes think that the grass is greener on the other side, but let me make my case otherwise.  I often joke that ‪Monday through Friday‬, my rural Georgia life and Sonia’s city life look exactly the same. The main difference is that she has better restaurant options on the weekends. Through my frequent talks with her, I see how the details of our lives are actually so similarly aligned. But the similarity of our human experience has been muddled in the recent years… thanks to the internet.

Social media can spread truth, but it can also be misleading. It makes you think that you’re supposed to be leading a certain lifestyle and meeting certain measures. But l let me tell you that behind all the photos, there is a lot of sacrifice.  As Mothers we all have to wake our kids up, hope that they are in a good mood, get them ready and shipped off to school, go to work or to the gym, pick up the kids, bus them around to after school activities, get dinner ready, and then wind down at night just to do it all over again the next day.  On top of the daily activities, we are trying to put our best foot forward to be our best and most beautiful selves, and think of creative ways to truthfully and meaningfully connect on social media platforms, arrange the meetings, attend the conferences, and organize the photo shoots. I could go on forever.

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Chicks And Salsa has a network of almost 15,000 women strong and we all agree that the struggle is real.  If you are lucky, you can carve out a few minutes to catch your breath, throw on a face mask and put your best foot forward every day. And remember, the emphasis on the ‘few minutes’.

This post has been a long time coming, a reminder that you are living your best life and that finding the silver lining in everything you do is a matter of perspective.  In my experience, Mother’s are the glue that holds everything together. It is our responsibility to also share what we are going through with each other and keep it real — because we are all going through it.  We also need to be there for each other because if we truly are the same, then the thoughts and feelings we experience in this journey through marriage, maturing, and parenthood is also the same. 

We Make Time For Our Chicks
We Get Our Stuff Done

Over the years we have tackled all kinds of issues with our friends and families, everything from divorce, counseling, death, illness, and bullying. But sometimes the ‘sisterhood’ and support is lacking when you see women criticize others or amplify each other’s shortcomings. This is our chance to unite and lift each other up. We each have good days and we each have bad days. Especially as Mother’s, Sonia and I can both attest to the strength it requires to remain a stable force in a constant moving stream that is family. I just wanted to remind you that before you wish you had someone else’s life, learn to love what you have and where you live — your every day is amazing, I promise. I recently wrote a reflective piece about a local place that means a lot to me and my family.  Find your special corner in this world and make it yours!

Cheers,
Rina

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Stone Mountain: Magic and Memories

I have highlighted some of the things that I love to do around the Atlanta area before. One in particular has become really special to is Stone Mountain. Its always an adventure and a family affair when you go there.  The trails, the events, the scenery all add up to the memories I have had at this place starting almost 20 years ago when I was in college.  My husband and I went on our first date there – we climbed it and chatted the whole way up- best first date ever!  It was the perfect start to a relationship filled with fun and adventure (going on 14 years this year).   

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Stone Mountain is a true all year round experience and as someone who has been a member there for several years, I can say that it is one of the best investments I make year after year.  You can look up the benefits of membership yourself, but I want to share why getting into nature with my family and friends brings me the greatest joy of all. 

My father is very ‘outdoorsy’ and that gene has definitely passed down to Sonia and I.  We watched very little television as kids because my Dad always thought it was better for us to spend our time outside walking, gardening, enjoying the breeze, or doing ANYTHING other than watch TV.  The memories we made seeing new parts of our town, or carving out new paths were priceless.  I am quite sure that at one point or another we have been to most of the state parks and nature preserves in Illinois.  Now that I don’t live near my parents, I am so grateful for that time we spent together talking about their childhood or our lives. 

Similarly, getting into nature and checking in with my kids and friends over a walk has become part of our routine in our day to day life.   On most days we bike on our street, play tennis, or just sit on our porch, but when we have time, we go to Stone Mountain. 

From riding the gondola that takes you to the top, riding the train around the mountain, watching the laser show, or tubing down Snow Mountain, this place is amazing!

What place have you and your family made ‘yours’ ?  I’d love to hear about the special things you do build memories in the comments.

Cheers,

Rina

SPANX

This Is 38- Unedited and Unfiltered

I remember a time when the thought of aging scared me.  I didn’t want to get older because I didn’t want to see my parents get older and I had a fear of the unknown.  I have shared before that I have counted by blessings every step of the way growing up. Every vacation, I enjoyed. Every hour spent with family members and friends, I cherished. Every opportunity that ever came my way, I took.  I was worried that if things were so great now, how could it get any better?

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My Mom has told me for decades that somehow things keep getting better, but until life started moving at lightning speed I did not understand.  In a moment, it seems, I got married, had one kid, had another, moved, and woke up 38 years old and truthfully … it feels great!

I am tearing up as I count my lucky stars for the life I never dreamed I would have.  As I blew out the candle on my cake this morning, I wish that NOTHING would change this year.  I know that is unrealistic and that change, both good and bad, are a part of life… but if somehow I could keep my dreams and loved ones close this year I would be grateful.

Remember when you thought someone who was 38 was ‘old.’ I do, now I look at my Mom and her friends and honestly think that they are #SquadGoals.  Raising a family and being part of a community has truly been the most gratifying experience of my life.  When I step back and look at my Mom and her friends, I see a glimpse into my future. If I keep working hard every day and always do what is right for me and my family, that future looks bright!

Not only do I not feel old, but I don’t even know what the word ‘old’ means anymore and thank god for that! Thanks for reading my post and for being a part of my evolution through Chicks and Salsa and Digital Chicks Media.  I am truly grateful!

Your Chick,

Rina

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